Today is My Last Day

It is about eight o'clock in the morning. Emily and I are all packed to leave for the States tonight at 12:30 am. We have our final exam. I spent last night preparing for the test, so I feel pretty good about it. However, I need to review, so this blog will be short. I wanted to include some pictures from the last field study that we had in the area of Galilee. If I have the time later on this afternoon, I plan on writing a few more blogs. If not, I will have post-Israel blogs up over the weekend...



This picture was taken at Dan. Dan is flowing with streams and rushing rivers. It receives its water from Mt. Hermon (elevation of over 9,000 feet) in the north. The snow and rain from Mt. Hermon flow into Dan.



On the top of Mt. Arbel I was able to overlook the northern end of the Sea of Galilee. Behind me you can see the Plain of Gennesaret and the Rosh Pinna Sill. We made a descent along the cliff of Mt. Arbel and traveled into the Arbel Pass. At one point in the descent, I was climbing on the wall/edge of the cliff. Pretty awesome.







On the boat crossing to the northern end of the Sea of Galilee!!

A Fun Night in Galilee

When we visited the regions of the Jezreel Valley, Upper and Lower Galilee, Samaria, Dan, etc... we stayed in Tiberius, a town on the western side of the Sea of Galilee (or Lake of Galilee). I was exhausted, but a group was going out to explore the area and thought to myself, "How often does one have the opportunity to walk around a port town that Jesus and the disciples spent time in? Not often!"

We made it down to the lake after a very long and steep descent from our hotel (thanks to my keen sense of direction...eh hem).
Honestly, I felt as if I was at a beach town back in the states. There was techno music blaring from shops, bars, and ice cream stands running parallel with the lake. When we all sat down under a canopy on the deck overlooking the lake, we simultaneously commented on the fact that our background music to this experience was Justin Timberlake- absolutely ludicrous.

Regardless, the night was filled with laughs and stories. We took the time we had together to share testimonies of Christ in our lives...and that is something I will never forget and intend to cherish about this experience. How amazing our God is- the great orchestrator. He allows us to cross paths with perfect strangers, leading us to distant places, by His grace that we might know Him more and glorify His name. Priceless.

Emily!

This is the beautiful Miss Emily D. Ford (soon to be Emily D. Barney). She has been my roommate this entire trip. Em has been a god-sent. I have been learning and growing alongside her this entire journey. Lots of laughs, tears, and prayers. She has a beautiful heart and is passionate about the Lord. She deserves a special place in this blog. Love you Em...and hopefully you don't wake up and freak out because I am still typing next to you at two in the morning.

Oskar Schindler's Grave

Pretty self-explanatory. This is the site of Oskar Schindler's grave. My friend Joanna and I decided to take a stroll (up a few hills) to see his grave. Joanna has wanted to see Schindler's grave since she watched Schindler's list several years ago. Apparently Jews still come visit the site (as well as tourists and the like) and continue to place stones on his grave just like they did at the end of the movie.

The Reality of the Gospel Message

So, as many of you can see, I am attempting to catch you up on the past week and a half. There is far too much to tell and describe to you, but these next few pictures hold much significance (though they may not be as appealing as the waterfalls).

This past Thursday we had a free day. However, before the free day began, we had a tour of the Garden Tomb scheduled at 8:30 a.m. Not much of a free day, huh? Well, that was exactly the attitude I had walking into the tour. I was tired, I had laundry to do, and not to mention an exam the next day. I had no anticipation or expectation for the tour that lay ahead of me.

The Garden Tomb, like the Church of the Holy Sepulcher, is a "traditional" site for Jesus' tomb as well as where he was crucified. Our tour guide (a British, witty, charismatic Christian) explained to us that the Garden Tomb may have been a possible location for Jesus' tomb, but Dr. Steve believes that the Church of the Holy Sepulcher is the more probable location. Regardless of whether or not Jesus was buried at the Garden Tomb, it was at this site that the Holy Spirit interrupted me with the reality of the gospel once again.

May I remind you, my body was weak and my desire was not to be up at 8:30 in the morning by any means. Yet, it was precisely during that time that God chose to meet me. Our charismatic, dry-humored, British tour guide began to explain to us that "though Jesus may not have been buried at the Garden Tomb, the reality of his victory over death and sin remains. In Christ the believer receives freedom from guilt, sin, and shame and for that we have reason to rejoice." He continued, "His grace is sure and is sufficient for all of our sins and weaknesses. Jesus Christ won the ultimate victory and he leaves us an empty tomb because He lives as the One who redeemed us from all of our transgressions."

It was then that the reality of the sufficiency of Christ's work on the cross as well as the security of His grace was made known to me yet again. His righteousness has been imputed to me by faith. In that knowledge I rejoiced and continue to rejoice as I reflect on His secure work yet again.

I could not push back the tears that began to form. As they slipped from underneath my sunglasses and rolled down my cheeks I treasured the reality of my living Savior. So many people travel to the Holy Land expecting God to meet them there. I have been watching men, women, and children kiss ancient artifacts or wait in line for hours hoping to touch the piece of stone that Jesus laid on when he was buried. All of them searching for hope, for redemption, for justification. Now, I am not the judger of a man's heart, and I would love to believe that many of these people know Christ. However, I do know that "broad is the road that leads to destruction and narrow the road that leads to life..." and oh how my heart aches that these people may know and understand that justification comes only by faith!

How sweet it was to be reminded on that Thursday morning of the grace that has washed all my sins away. May you be reminded as well.

Here are some more pictures from the Garden Tomb... (the group that you see worshipping was a group visiting from Europe singing the song, "He's Alive!" It was powerful.)

Waterfalls at David's Canyon

After spending quite a bit of time in En-Gedi, just off the coast of the Dead Sea, our group headed over to David's Canyon. This was a spot in the Judean Wilderness where David spent a lot of time. This is a picture I took of the group, as Dr. Steve read to us many of the Psalms. Dr. Steve was telling us that the Judean Wilderness, unlike the Great Wilderness, was a place of refuge. For shepherds, and those who truly know the land, even though the desert is dry and hot, it is a refuge for them because they know how to access water. So in David's Canyon, we traveled alongside streams and walked by waterfalls.

I also found it quite interesting that when David asked God to "lead him to a rock that is higher than I" (I'm sorry I cannot site the specific Scripture reference for you, my roommate Emily is fast asleep next to me and I don't want to wake her up looking for my Bible) he was not looking for a rock to stand upon. Rather, he was looking for a rock that was larger than him in order to find shade in the midst of the scorching desert heat. This dramatically changed the way I read some of the Psalms. The land truly causes Scripture to come even more alive. Below are some pictures from this site.

And more...

So this was pretty funny. Our group had just finished our camel ride (which I showed you a picture of below...and for all of you wondering, the guy I am sitting with is like my little brother--he is a FRIEND) at the Bedouin Dude Ranch. After our ride, we all lounged in the Bedouin tent and drank tea, ate pitas, and sang songs. This is a picture of my friends singing and dancing with the Bedouin who was teaching us about their culture. One of the best experiences I have had on this trip. There is nothing like sleeping in a giant open tent in the middle of the desert.



Behind me is the southern end of the Dead Sea. Later on that day we swam in it and of course I worked really hard at keeping the salt from entering my mouth and eyes. Yet, somehow a tiny drop of water seeped its way into the corner of my eye and I experienced much pain. I decided it wasn't worth freaking out about so I just chilled, laid back, and bobbed in the water like a beach ball (there is such a high concentration of salt in the Dead Sea that you float--it was pretty neat). Anyway, this picture was taken just before hiking to the top of Masada- a fortress built by the Hasmoneans (specifically the High Priest Jonathan). Eventually the fortress was taken over by Herod the Great who used it as a place of refuge in the Judean Wilderness. Who was he seeking refuge from? His enemies of course... the Jews. Around 66 A.D. the Sicarii (men of the dagger- a radical religious group) who were a part of the Jewish Revolt, took over Masada. However, not too long after the destruction of Jerusalem in 70 A.D., Masada was again conquered and this time by the Romans. There were many Jews who committed suicide (or so the historians say) at Masada instead of surrendering to Rome. Below are more pictures from this site.

So... No blog, but more pictures!

So this really has no historical, geographical, or Biblical significance whatsoever. However, for those of you who know of my interest in Starbucks, I am happy to declare to you that I have discovered the Starbucks of Israel! I proudly display to you my first iced soy latte purchased from Aroma...the Hebrew Starbucks (except they give you a piece of chocolate with every drink you purchase- way to one up Starbucks eh?) I had been craving an iced soy latte since my experience at the Arabic Starbucks in Jordan. It was pretty hilarious. We were leaving Tel Be'er Sheva and traveling to Tel Arad, when lo and behold in the middle of the desert was ... get this ... a Hebrew McDonalds (completely kosher) and an Aroma. You can imagine my delight. Let's just say out of all the pictures that I have taken, this one is probably my favorite. Pathetic, I know.



This was inside the Bell Caves. Dr. Steve, our awesome tour guide (really, he is awesome... a humble, genius, man of God) read to us a passage from one of Josephus' writings. Josephus describes to his readers the use of these Bell Caves during early church history. He tells us that many Christians sought refuge in these caves during times of persecution under emperors such as Nero or Trajan or Hadrian. Also, those seeking to live an ascetic life would often flee to caves such as these. They were truly a sight to see.






This is one of the three largest blocks built into the Western Wall of the Temple. One of these blocks weighs 600 tons! Imagine how Herod the Great was able to transport these massive things. One theory, which our tour guide Dave said was absolutely ridiculous, is that they (meaning the builders of the temple) rolled large cylinders (roughly about 900 tons in weight) from the north into the area of Mt. Moriah (the second temple mount) and cut the blocks out of the cylinders. Dave didn't like this theory because he wondered if those who came up with it thought of how one would successfully stop a 900 ton cylinder rolling down a hill. He was a very comical individual.

My Apology

Dear Blog Reader:

I am horrible at consistently blogging. This last week has definitely been rigorous - physically, spiritually, and academically.

However, for know I am going to post some random pictures for you. Pictures are always interesting to take a look at! Miss you all.

Love, Al

The Dome of the Rock and the Western Wall

Thursday, May 20, 2010

This picture was taken a few hours ago on our NT Jerusalem walk around the Old City. Behind me is both the Dome of the Rock to my right (your left) and the Western Wall (or Wailing Wall) is to my left (your right). The Dome of the Rock lies in the heart of where the second temple used to stand. It is a Muslim Mosque. The Western Wall is the remainder of the retaining wall that surrounded both the first and the second temples. Jews still go to this wall to pray and worship because they believe that God's presence still dwells at the wall. In fact, this past Tuesday and Wednesday was the Jewish festival Shavout, and the Western Wall was packed with Jews celebrating.

No one besides practicing Muslims are permitted to enter the Dome of the Rock or the El Aksa, which is another mosque to the left of the Dome of the Rock. El Aksa was built in the year 690 and the Dome of the Rock in 710. El Aksa is said to be the place where Muhammed (Allah's prophet) met with the men of old (such as Jesus himself) and here Allah gave him a word that supersedes all other religions.

However...due to the fact that a few of us have befriended Qusay, we may be going to the Dome of the Rock this upcoming Saturday. I just saw Qusay earlier tonight, and he informed me that I need to have my hair wrapped. If this trip takes place, I'll be sure to blog about it!

I have much more to say...but for now, I am studying and going to bed. Miss you all.

Shadduk Palace, Hezekiah's Tunnel, Etc.

Some Pictures From Jordan

Snapshots of My Time in The Old City

Monday, May 17, 2008 (a little late, sorry)

Today we had orientation at Jerusalem College University. Since we flew in to Amman, Jordan first, our orientation had to wait until we arrived in Jerusalem. Cindy, a professor at the university, lead our orientation. Something she said about this three week study tour really deserves mentioning in this blog. Cindy said that the way in which information is received during this tour is a lot like attempting to take a drink of water from a fire hose... aka, "information overload." So, my dear blog reader, picture that analogy and apply it to my time here- it will help you understand what it feels like.

Yet, my silent prayer has been that I would hear and see Jesus in the midst of this intense trip. I must be honest and say that there are so many distractions in Jerusalem. Whether it be the atmosphere of the marketplace, the Muslim call to prayer that echoes throughout the city five times a day, the Orthodox Christians bustling through the Via Dolorosa, or the Israeli soldiers walking through the streets- there is always something or someone that grabs my attention.

Sunday (yesterday) was our first "free day." After staying up way too late with some new friends, I still decided to wake up early to go to Mass at the Holy Sepulcher just down the street from our hotel. A group of us walked down the stone road (St. Francis Street) as the church bells rang throughout the narrow roads.

The Holy Sepulcher is like the “Disneyland” of Catholic churches. A Mass is going on while tourists are surrounding the place taking pictures left and right. It was one of the most heart-renching experiences I have had yet. I watched as a young mother knelt over a Catholic prayer book with a candle lit next to it earnestly saying her liturgical prayers out loud. How close she is to religiosity, but so far away from true freedom. Tears flooded my eyes as I observed her desperation for hope and eternal life. Meanwhile, her little girl lay sprawled out on the stone bench behind her mom. I thought to myself, “Where is her husband? Where is this child’s father?” I only wish I knew her story, but my Father does. I silently prayed that and hoped that the Holy Spirit would reveal Jesus to this young, pious, mom and her little child. He is faithful.

Later on that day, my friend John and I went walking through the Old City and we stopped at a shop owned by a young Arabic Muslim, Qusay. Qusay invited us in for tea and sage (delicious!) He had already been interacting with some of the other students on our study tour—I think he really enjoys practicing his English with us (which is very good, by the way) and sharing with us his political and religious views.

It was almost too much to handle, sitting with him as we communed together. I can’t explain the connection I felt to this 22-year-old with so much life experience tucked under his belt. Qusay speaks 6 different languages, runs his own shop, trains horses, and is the youngest of a family of 10 (or more, I can’t remember). His father just passed away 9 months ago at the age of 84. He is the last to live at home, all of his older siblings are married.

During our visit with Qusay, John and I met Qusay’s nephew who is 26-years-old (older than him!) Qusay is called the “cool one” by those who know him… and everyone in the Arab community knows him as we quickly have found out. He just spent a year in Vancouver, Canada and was there during the 2010 Winter Olympics.

Qusay asked John and I if we thought there would ever be peace between the Arabs and the Jews. John answered for us by saying that he hopes so…that at least there could be a compromise. Qusay respectfully shared with us his opinion by blatantly saying that there could never be peace between them. He is convinced that the land never belonged to the Jews, which comes from his Muslim understanding of the Koran. He then proceeded to discuss with us the differing views of the jews and Muslims, and what life is like in Israel for Qusay as a Palestinian Muslim.

The tears came as Qusay shared with us how he has been blatantly asked my tourists, “Why do you Arabs blow yourselves up?” How ignorant and rude people can be! We can be so abrasive and insensitive to that which we do not understand. Qusay’s character revealed itself as he communicated to us how he handles situations such as these. I saw his humanity, his honesty in that moment. He just wants to be understood and respected…listened to. That’s all. I felt this was our time to give him that attention.

It was really neat when Qusay began to share with us how many Christians convert to Islam. God gave me an opportunity to share how I also have heard of Muslims convert but to Christianity. I told him of stories of Muslims having visions of a man dressed in white revealing Himself to them (that man being Jesus of course.) He did not entertain this information, but began to discuss how Islam, Christianity, and Judaism are the only three real religions. This statement led into a discussion about marriage and how he can marry a Christian or a Jew because their religion is “real,” but that the woman would have to convert to Islam. Man, I learned a lot today.

I do not know if I will have the opportunity to share the Gospel with him, but I do know that God has led our group to Qusay. So, if you are reading this, pray with me that he would be one of these Muslim people that I have heard of who have been interrupted by the Lord Jesus. As I write this entry it is Tuesday night…so, I had tea with Qusay back on Sunday. Tonight, when I was in the Old City again, I ran into him. He showed my friend Aaron and I a great shop to eat schwarma (this is Aaron’s favorite food here—it is pita bread stuffed with hummus, chicken or lamb, and French fries…tons of carbs, but really good). God is definitely keeping the door wide open to a friendship with this dude. Pretty awesome.

I must go to bed for now, Bethlehem in the morning!! I am going to attempt to upload some pictures soon. So for those of you who are following—stay tuned!

Something to Make You Laugh...

Saturday, May 15, 2010

So, Emily (my roommate from Zion) and I just woke up after our first night's sleep and God bless her- she reminded me to tell all of you of my final experience after exiting the land of Jordan.

Two hours after leaving Petra, our bus and tour guide Dahoud (spelling? it is pronounced "da-ooud") began tapping loudly on his microphone in order to grab the attention of our bus (he referred to us as a chatty bunch...go figure). He caught my attention quickly when he asked, "Who stayed in 447 back at hotel in Petra?" Em and I raised our hands and he informed us that the hotel was on the other end of his cell phone reporting that one of us had left our phones behind...guess what genius did that? ME!!

Strangely enough, I was really calm. Apparently, another group from the same program we are a part of will be going through Amman in a week or so. Dahoud is going to hold my phone and pass it off to the other group. Hopefully I will get it before I leave to return to the States. If not, I'm sure something will work out.

The real kicker is that once we arrived at our hotel in the Old City, Em and I quickly unpacked. As the bottom of my luggage bag came in view, I began to realize that something else was missing as well. My new, $16, %100 cotton, target robe. This sick feeling entered my belly and I found myself extremely disappointed! Can you believe that the reaction I should have had about my phone I was having about a stinkin bath robe! I left the thing on the back of the bathroom door in the Petra hotel. What gets me is that the hotel found my cell phone, but not my robe? Either way, now I can truthfully say "What happens in Petra, stays in Petra."

Random Words to Summarize My Time in Jordan

Friday, May 14, 2010

Honestly, there is so much running through my mind that I am not sure how this blog is going to turn out. But, I’ll give it a try to update those of you who are following me while I travel on this journey in the Holy Land.

After spending a few days in Jordan, I have finally arrived in Jerusalem. Due to a divine act of God, our group is no longer staying at the Jerusalem University College dorms during our stay in the holy city. Instead, we are conveniently tucked away in a vintage hotel in the Old City. The Palace Hotel truly lives up to its name. When I look out my window I feel as though I am overlooking a dream. I’m overwhelmed with the sites here.

Rewinding a bit, I’ll update you on the past couple of days. While in Jordan, we traveled through Upper and Lower Gilead, as well as Moab and Edom. The sites have been fascinating. I have been meeting so many of the Arab people during my visit here. In fact, the most thrilling part for me has been interacting with the natives. Every stop we made we were bombarded with Arab men attempting to sell us something or to “accompany” us females to our next destination. Let’s just say that when we were going through customs upon entering Israel from Jordan, the officer who was examining the computer screen displaying the contents of our bags was too busy staring at the females in our group than actually paying attention to our luggage. Better yet, on our way back from Petra, the men were asking us if we wanted “ride on horse” and when we refused they responded with, “Okay, no horse, then you take me?” Apparently pick-up lines are universally cheesy.

At this one particular spot we visited the temple of Zeus and the gate of Hadrian, a roman emperor who reigned during the second century. After spending hours gallivanting through the ancient Roman ruins, we stopped in the tourist market. A group of us waited for the rest to return and decided to look around this eclectic marketplace. A man gave me a beautiful pair of earrings for free and another man was insisting that he was a magician and had the power to make “man and woman fall in love.”

We had a blast laughing, singing, and joking with these Arabs. However, one in particular truly grabbed my heart. I soon found that his name was Stephano (spelling?) Like majority of the Arab people, he was beautiful. He dressed well, wore his hair long and curly, but there was sadness in his eyes. Deep sadness. He, unlike the rest of his comrades in the market, was not laughing and joking with us Americans. However, I had an opportunity to peer through a small window in his soul. After Stephano discovered I was from the states, Boston area specifically, he asked me how I liked it. He remarked about his distaste for busyness and chaos and explained to me why he loved his country so much. He loves the atmosphere that is carefree and relaxed. This young man had depth to him, that was certain. Yet, he was broken and he could not conceal his emptiness well. He eventually inquired about my occupation and my reason for visiting his country. As soon as we began to discuss my role as a Bible college student and whether or not the Bible bored me, our group was packing up to leave. I never got to finish my conversation with Stephano, but I will be praying for him. Oh that Jesus might reveal himself to Stephano and break the chains that choke his heart.

Hopefully this isn’t boring you yet. There is just so much to tell and I am trying to be intentional in communicating my experience thus far. I’ll sum up the remainder of my time in Jordan by sharing that yesterday I had a blast visiting Mt. Nebo and Petra. Mt. Nebo is the location where Moses was just before he died (take a look at Deuteronomy 34). This site left me in awe.

After Mt. Nebo, we visited a Greek Orthodox Church, which displayed mosaic (which is native to the Arab people—their specialty) all over the walls and floors of the beautiful old building. As we got back onto the bus, my friend Aaron and my new friend Josiah decided to join the little Arab boys in a game of soccer on the street. We have had so many opportunities to immerse ourselves in the culture, I am glad to so many of us have been taking advantage of these moments.

We finished our day at Petra. There was a picture at every corner of our walk through the “canon.” I swear I saw Harrison Ford… just sayin. Or at least the men who were involved in the live sacrifice in the third Indiana Jones film. ☺ I was on information overload during this time, but I attempted to soak up every moment of it. This was by far the most populated tourist site, which attempted to take away from its grandeur. Nonetheless, I stole away in solitude any chance I was given during this visit. Truly, our Father’s creation is breathtaking and something to be pondered. During one of these quiet moments I wandered up a series of dirt steps to what was once royal tombs. Of course, once I arrived at the top, a Bedouin was there selling his trinkets. I bargained with him for a Bedouin scarf/ hat thing for my brother. I was successful in knocking the price down a few dollars. It was here that I met a family from New York City. They seemed to be quite wealthy and must have been on a private tour with their own guide. We made small talk and quickly parted ways—I love how small this world is. At the peek of a dusty ruin almost 6,000 miles away from the east coast I bump into a family visiting from a state that just about borders mine. I love it.

My eyes are beginning to shut, so I will leave you here for now. I will be sure to tell you of my thoughts and meditations in Jerusalem. Already I have been experiencing the clash of the three monotheistic religions—Judaism, Islam, and Christianity. Tonight, I had stepped out of my hotel no more than 5 minutes, and found myself in the midst of a crowd of Jews hurriedly making their way to service at their local synagogue. I’m thriving off the atmosphere that permeates this enchanting city. To be continued…

My Thoughts In Amman, Jordan

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

So, I have been in Amman, Jordan since 4:30 pm Tuesday, May 11th. It is currently 6:18 am on Wednesday. For those reading back in the states (on the east coast that is) it is 11:18 pm. Just to give you a proper context as you read.

Thus far, I have paid $17.28 in the JFK airport for a package of dried mangos, a hummus/pretzel pack, and an iced green tea. You’ve got to love airport prices. I have sat on an airplane for a total of 13 hours, which in actuality wasn’t that bad. It amazed me that a beautiful baby boy sat in silence for the majority of the flight to Amman. However, this was not the case for the well-meaning woman who sat behind me and complained about the grotesque movie she was watching but convinced herself it was worth viewing in order to pass the time of the flight. Oh, how I truly do love people.

When our group arrived in Jordan, we awkwardly assembled as we exited the terminal. Confusion was stirring as we were uncertain whether or not we needed to purchase a Visa. Thankfully, our soon-to-be friend Ramez recognized our bewildered group. We were the Americans he was to guide to our bus and hotel.

Choosing to sit at the front of the bus… well, I stopped here earlier this morning and am now resuming at 11:15 pm. I’ll save the funny story about Ramez for those of you I get to talk with one on one.

As of yet, I have not adjusted to the food and time here, still reaping the effects of jet-lag. Pita bread has become my food of choice. Pita with butter, jelly, honey…tonight I was tempted to purchase a container of Nutella to smear on top of pitas in the morning! (Hmm…if only they had Fluff in the Middle East.) Water is a rare commodity in Jordan, as well as majority of the Middle East. After purchasing two 1.5 liter bottles of water at a grocery store for under one American dollar, I came to the realization that the hotel waiters have been overcharging our group—making a profit charging us $3.00 a bottle! I found this to be quite comical.

There is so much to remark about after this day. We traveled northwest of Amman, Jordan (the city we are staying in—the largest city in Jordan). Crossing over the Jabbuk Canyon and into Upper Gilead (Gilead was a place of “healing” or refuge for many, especially Christians, after the Jewish revolt in 65 AD). There were so many sites that we saw. While walking through the ruins of the Roman cities of the Decopolis have been fascinating, I am realizing a lot about myself and the heart that God is fashioning in me…

Allow me to display a snapshot of my heart and mind, if you will. One of the greatest sins that I struggle with is pride. I can easily focus more on making much of myself rather than making much of Christ. However, God in His faithfulness does not allow me to stay in that place. Rather, He is constantly placing me in situations in which I am confronted head on with this sin, in order that He might purge it out of me and make me more like Him—a humble servant.
Instead of trying to be something I’m not on this trip, God has been dealing with me and revealing in my heart what He has placed there. Let me explain…I have joined this study tour with many students across the country. There is a group from Texas, Arizona, Minnesota, North Dakota, and Massachusetts. Many of these individuals are currently studying Greek and Hebrew or are already very familiar with Biblical language and context. I am fascinated by each of their interests and pursuits—it is intriguing to say the least. However, I quickly noticed the tendency in me to “step-up my game.” Almost immediately I felt I had to prove myself in order to be better accepted or to fit in. How ridiculous, I know, but I am just being honest with what went on inside my head.

A scholar I am not. An archeologist I most certainly am not. But what am I? What is this group? Servants and followers of Jesus Christ. Coincidently, on the bus today I chose to listen to a podcast of a sermon of a friend of mine preached a month or so back. This was the exact point made in the sermon. Basically, when what we are supersedes who we are we grow and mature in our walk with Christ. When position (servants of Christ) trumps identity (scholar, make-up artist, barista, etc.) we are unified as a body and more effective in the kingdom of God.

So needless to say, in the midst of this Arab land, Jesus is drawing me closer to Himself in a way I hardly expected…to be continued! I must go to bed, Petra in the morning!

Oh! And by the way, many of you (friends and family) will appreciate this! Tonight after dinner, a group of us went to an Arabic Starbucks! Who would of thought? They even had soymilk. You can imagine what joy this brought me. Louie Armstrong was even playing in the background. I wonder how the Arab employees feel about the musical styling of Louie and the rest of the jazzy bunch played on Starbuck’s radio. Nonetheless, I was thrilled! There is nothing like seeing Muslims dressed in long white robes sitting Indian-style on sofas while sipping on lattes and eating chocolate chip cookies. Can you believe I forgot my camera? Typical.

My Cry

I am recognizing a need in all of God's children...that is to have kingdom perception of who they are in the Father's eyes. Oh, how desperately I need to be reminded in the word of my role as a woman...

"God, renew my mind that I might understand how you have intended me to live and function in the Body of Christ. Help me to be a woman of truth, integrity and discipline. Expose Satan's schemes and lies in me and those you have placed around me that we might walk in the roles you have intended for us before the fall. Shed light on the bad examples and perceptions that have clouded our vision of the life you meant for us to life. Oh Father, make us more like your Son Jesus. Amen."

I've Been "Kept"

As the close of the semester ends at the speed of light, there has been a silent meditation in my heart that I cannot shake. It goes something like this:

"Oh how He keeps me."

This year has been somewhat of a blur. Not at all what I expected. Which in essence, should never surprise me, yet it continually does season after season. Honestly, it is early in the morning and I had a few moments to tap at these keys so I thought I would get it out there. I have no formed words to express this meditation as of yet. So for the time being, I will leave you with the words of the apostle Paul to his "true son in the faith," Timothy:

"Remember Jesus Christ, risen from the dead, the offspring of David,
as preached in my gospel, for which I am suffering, bound with chains
as a criminal. But the word of God is not bound! Therefore I endure
everything for the sake of the elect, that they may obtain the salvation
that is in Christ Jesus with eternal glory. The saying is trustworthy, for:

If we have died with him, we will also live with him;
if we endure, we will also reign with him;
if we deny him, he also will deny us;
if we are faithless, he remains faithful--

for he cannot deny himself.

I identify with the close of this passage. His faithfulness is what has kept me, not mine. And THAT is for another blog. Be strong in the Lord today in His might. Seek His face continually...without Him we can do nothing.

My Reason For Existence

I realize that the title of this blog is rather intense. Even "epic," if you will. Yet, there is so much significance to it.

I just got off the phone with a dear, dear friend of mine. Ten years ago, he was just my brother's best friend. Now, he is still my brother's best friend, but more importantly he is a brother in Christ. I definitely have taken on the role of "big sister" in his life. He may not tell you that, but I have willingly stepped into this esteemed position.

For the sake of his protection, let's call him "G." G is a rare breed. Ever since I can remember, that kid has been asking my mom, my brother, and me all about faith and Jesus. There has been a stirring desire in him for years in regards to Truth and the Bible. I can recall several times where I have had the privilege to sit with him over a latte or in my living room back in East Longmeadow and discuss the "real meaning" of life.

G is intelligent, inquisitive, and hard headed. I love that about him. When I listen to him battle with the reality of the Gospel message, I recognize the beginning traits and characteristics of a modern day reformer. I feel like if I knew Martin Luther personally, I would be able to liken G to him.

We have not seen one another in over a year. Yes, life just conveniently prevents such things from happening. However, tonight after exchanging a few generic "Happy Easter" text messages, G decided to pick up the phone and call me. What followed after was quite unexpected...

Just a few weeks ago i spoke at dorm devotionals at my school. For the blog reader who has no idea what a dorm devotional is, let me explain. It simply is a night out of each month where the entire dormitory of girls gather together to worship and listen to God's Word. That night, I exposited out of Galatians 1:6-9. Without going in to every detail of the message, I explained to the girl's how we are no different from the Galatians that the apostle Paul was writing to. Just as Paul was bewildered by the way in which the Galatians were "adding" to Christ's finished work on the cross, so do we add to that work.

During my preparation for the message, God had is way with me. He really began to reveal to me how often I am preoccupied with my performances rather than being captivated by the grace and mercy of Jesus Christ ultimately displayed at Calvary. Needless to say, I spoke my message from a place of true understanding.

It was so humbling to watch the Holy Spirit work in the hearts of those girls as the Word of God was communicated through a broken sinner such as myself. Why do I recount this night? Simply because that message i spoke lives on and I watched it play out before my very eyes as I talked with G this Easter night.

There is no greater honor than to encourage another believer in the knowledge of God's grace (hmmmm..maybe "My Reason For Existence"?..well, besides glorifying God..which I suppose encouraging someone in the Lord would ultimately do). G is in a battle right now. He is seeing God do awesome things in his life. He recognizes God's hand and genuinely desires to live a righteous life. However, like majority of us, he finds himself bound by his own ability to do right by God. Wait a minute... did I just type that in a blog? YES. Just like the Galatians, just like myself, G has been attempting to add to Christ's finish work on the cross where Christ died for G's sins (as well as the rest of mankind's, might I also add).

Why did I write about this? In hopes that the one who is reading this blog would be able to identify with G and lift him up in prayer. Pray for his perseverance in the faith. Pray that the eyes of his heart would be enlightened to the knowledge of the hope that he has been called to, as well his inheritance. Pray that the guilt and condemnation that Satan has been attempting to bring on him would be removed. Pray that someday, G himself will be communicating and encouraging someone else in the knowledge of God's grace.

Why else did I write about this? In hopes that the reader will be encouraged in this same knowledge as well. May each of us like Paul declare, "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." (Galatians 2:20, ESV)

...I'm overwhelmed by His goodness...


After a beautiful, warm April night I find myself sitting alone in my room. Outside, I can still hear the sound of cars whistling by. New England is attempting to steal every minute of this "summerish" evening, I'm sure. Meanwhile, the crisp night air is seeping through the open window, softly whispering to me, "stay awake." My body is telling me to go to sleep... if you saw my face, you would tell me to get some rest as well. Yet, I cannot help but express the joy I am experiencing in yet another..."moment."

I was thinking about a friend of mine tonight...so I prayed for this special person. I got to pondering on how amazing that is. That somehow, God has allowed me to be a part of intercession for this individual. So I can't get this grin off my face. My boast and joy are in Jesus-- as they always should be. His pursuit of us is indescribable. How marvelous are His ways! That I can simply meditate and communicate to Him and know that He hears me. Much more than that, His will is unfolding in my very midst and He beckons me to come away with Him and be a part of the masterpiece in the making. How often I don't take the time to ponder these truths. It's startling.

Reflecting on my day, I realize how many moments I missed... moments where I didn't recognize His presence.

I have been reading a book about the resolve of Jonathan Edwards and have been immensely challenged by his life. At the age of eighteen and nineteen, as a recent believer, Edwards recorded his personal resolutions in order that he might live his life to the fullest in Christ. Just thinking about the desire and passion he had for God's glory startles me. "Startle" because I know I must come up "higher," if you will. So, in my minuscule attempt to learn and benefit from his life, I have recently begun my own list of "resolves."

I promise that I have been intentional about mentioning the resolve of Jonathan Edwards in this seemingly insignificant blog. In fact, this very day a resolve was birthed within me. "Resolved: to make it my aim and goal to be conscious of HIs presence at all times, regardless of the apparent circumstances taking place in my midst."

I suppose I could add to this resolve, a resolve to be conscious of the cross and what it represents-- not only at Easter, but always. May each of us seek by faith, to remain hidden behind Christ's "sure" work on the cross as we live and move and have our being in the midst of an ever-changing generation. The grace that we stand in--those of us who believe in Jesus Christ, the living Son of God--is secure. May we never forget this crucial truth.

...but now I must go and take care of the mundane bed-time tasks. Washing and exfoliating my face; brushing and flossing my teeth (well, flossing only when I'm not completely overwhelmed with exhaustion)... Yet, may each of us not lose sight of the One who goes before us always and upholds us in the midst of every chore, joy, and sorrow. To Him be all the glory and honor and power...forever. Amen.

A Simple Thought

Today when I was listening to a lesson on prayer, we read Revelation 12:11 which says, "And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they loved their lives even unto death." We were discussing how faith in Christ that is rooted in the Word, coupled with the blood of Christ and the word of our testimony will give us daily victory over the enemy of our souls.

In the class the instructor, John, shared with us some instances of new believers who upon their salvation picked up and traveled all over the country sharing their testimony with others. Yet, because they only had the "word of their testimony" their "ministries" quickly perished and some of them are unheard of today.

It was after John had told us this that I was reminded of the daily commitment that God is wanting from me. The "word of my testimony" can only take me so far. I must plunge deeper in the living Word of God so that my roots will be secured in the Word's unshakeable foundation. In doing so, I will be unmoved when the winds and storms do blow...because they most certainly will. Not only will I be firmly planted in Truth, but the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart will be the very words of the Father. Men will only hear Truth uttered from my lips as I feast upon the precious Word.

Jesus promised us times of testing, persecution, and natural disasters. Yet, those who set their hope and meditation in the Word of Truth will not perish but inherit everlasting life. Oh, how I pray that my ultimate delight would be in the Word! Let us be like the pslamist who wrote of the blessed man, "But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers" (Psalm 1:2,3).

Go now...be with Jesus.

Communion Results in Community

I am not entirely sure why I am choosing to blog in this moment because so much has been on my heart and mind over the past few weeks. I think I avoid blogging because I fear spoiling the beauty of God's work with my monotonous commentary. Yet, I must record my thoughts.

Hmm...where to begin. I have been prayerfully contemplating the idea of communion with the Father. In my attempts to find balance between intimate communion with Him and involvement in community, I have discovered that there is much needed work to be done in my heart.

Beginning with community...I have come to a continual awareness of its importance. For Christians, intentional and meaningful relationships are essential in growing in grace, love, and in a knowledge of God. Healthy community encourages honesty, embraces the brokenness and sinfulness of others, and creates space for forgiveness and redemption. Yet so often I find that in the midst of performing tasks, following up on responsibilities, and fulfilling my "duties," I dilute the significance of these relationships. Or rather, these interactions with others are no longer enjoyable but are "demanding," "time-suckers," or "distractions." What the heck is that all about?!

Now, let me compare this mentality with that of my Lord and Savior, Christ Jesus. During Jesus' three-year ministry, we only see a small portion of the many interactions he had with the people as recorded in the Synoptics and the book of John. Yet, what humbles me and leaves me bewildered is that Jesus had compassion and genuine understanding toward those that he interacted with during his journey. Knowing full well that the crowds would despise him, even those from within his inner circle would deny him, Jesus still continued to pour out love and grace and mercy to these individuals.

I could reference so many accounts of where this is demonstrated by Jesus. In actuality, his whole life epitomizes compassion and forbearance. Yet, I am reminded of Gethsemane. We read in Mark's account starting in 14:33, "And he took with him Peter and James and John, and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And he said to them, 'My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch.'" Only moments prior to his arrest, Jesus is in earnest intercession with the Father. What were the disciples doing? Sleeping! They had no comprehension of the anguish and turmoil that their Master was facing. Yet, Jesus persevered and accomplished the will of his father because he knew the joy and freedom that would result in his obedience.

Concerning communion, I am more and more aware of the Father's constant pursuit of His children. I am desperate for daily communion with the Godhead. In prayer and meditation I find strength and renewal for my soul. Though my soul clings to the dust, the Word of God gives me life! It is in communion that I gain greater understanding of the knowledge of God and I am encouraged and strengthened in my faith. As a result of communion, my soul rejoices and my heart is glad and I desire to pour out to others. When I see Jesus and read of his many characteristics, among them the "suffering servant," I am reminded that true joy and hope are not found in this life but in the life to come. Yes, this "suffering servant" was full of long-suffering, compassion, mercy, and love. He loved and still is loving the worst of sinners, tax collectors, and prostitutes. Jesus poured out his very life and gave all of himself to his disciples despite the fact that they were too weak or ashamed to acknowledge their association with him at the time of his greatest need.

Jesus example reminds me that I ought always to seek, watch, and pray. That in doing so, I will be overwhelmed with everlasting joy that will sustain me through every trial and tribulation. Yet, I must not stop there. I must press on and share that joy with others that they too may experience the joy of knowing Christ in the midst of a perverse and crooked generation. Paul was constantly overwhelmed with joy when he would hear of his churches pressing on in the faith for the sake of the gospel. Paul not only shared Jesus with the people, but he shared himself as well. He did this in order that they too would endure with patience the temporal trials of this life in order that their joy might be full and God might be most supremely glorified.

With that, I leave you with the most eloquent words of the apostle Paul to those in the city of Ephesus and its surrounding area, "In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestine according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of this will, so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory. In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory" (Ephesians 1:11-14).

Vulnerability. Man... being vulnerable is one of the most uncomfortable, utterly exposed positions one can find herself in. I am vulnerable. I am naked and found out. Nothing is hidden, everything is disclosed.

I thought I understood that God sees all things. He knows man's heart better than man himself. Yet, often this is not a reality in my life. The fact that God knows my innermost thoughts and motives does not always resonate in my mind. Until I find myself face to face with reality, His omniscience becomes real to me.

With aches that came from the depth of my being, I once again felt the sorrow that had once made its home within me years ago. I questioned whether or not I had learned from my past mistakes as I met this "friend" once again. By "friend" I refer to "pain." Though initially I did not perceive pain to be my friend, light shined into my heart and soul during the manifestation of this pain. Pain led me to see my depravity. I am utterly and hopelessly selfish.

In light of the suffering my Savior experienced on the cross, my ache is 1/1,000,000 of the pain caused by a tiny paper cut. Yet, I have the audacity and boldness to cry out and question my Creator. Does not suffering result in joy in my God? Does not affliction lead me to the throne of my Maker? How then can I despise this menial burden?

Knowing my frailty and lack of strength, He has been gracious and merciful toward me. He sent me a friend who was battling with her flesh and spirit in the moment of my anguish (or rather, pity). Gently, He confronted me with reality. Indeed, He is ever interceding for me at the right hand of the Father. He is not content that I find my pleasure and delight in what is earthly or temporal. My ultimate joy must reside in Him, my Sustainer and Source. He is not willing that I remain in this state of flux, rather that I rest upon the solid rock and sing His praise. He is worthy of all praise.

Seeing my friend's struggle, I was reminded that we are not alone in this battle. Truly affliction and discomfort bring about greater faith, greater hope, greater joy, and greater praise. Oh, that I would hold my tongue and not look inward but toward Him who formed me. Jesus is truly the Hound of Heaven. He is closing in on me, and allowing my world to cave in, in order that He might be adored above all else. May all of my affections be cast upon His sweet face as He leads me through the trials of this life.